Truth in Blogging
I'm not a very good blogger. I want to do it, and I keep coming up against barriers to what I want to talk about. I would probably go on and on about marketing, but I work for a law firm, and law firms are watched closely. I might inadvertently say something about what our Firm is thinking, planning, or doing that could be construed as misleading or false, and get my Firm in a lot of trouble. That would break my heart, not to mention my bank account. So I've been talking a bit about my self, but that is also an uncomfortable area, because I'm undergoing therapy for it. It's a mess.
I've actually considered setting up an anonymous blog, but that's not me either. The name of this blog is what I seek: it's got to be the truth, not an illusion dressed up to look like truth. The truth, however, is what prevents me from saying a lot of things here. I understand the desire to get naked on the web, and I respect many of those that can do so and draw readership. I don't know if I want to have a readership so much. I do know I don't want to cause harm to anyone I care about. It underscores my belief that sometimes the value of friendship is not communicating with anything other than silence. Though I'm a writer, I often find it more prudent to keep my mouth shut. So many words are wasted. I also communicate best through a keyboard, and have since I was a child. When I'm writing, I'm an engine on all cylinders; when I speak, I'm a horse-drawn carriage, with an old, tired horse. I fit and start.
I believe this topic compels me today because of something I read last night about Buckminster Fuller, who declared one day that there was nothing worth saying, and promptly shut up for the next two years. When he began to speak and write again, he had developed a bizarre way of communicating. It was clipped and didn't flow very well. He was trying to only say exactly what he meant, and he struggled. He said that mankind had a critical obligation to tell nothing but the truth to one another. He later went on to design the geodesic dome and coin the phrase "Spaceship Earth;" eventually he became a great communicator with the ability to excite people to think in new ways. He also declared, at the time of his darkest hour, that he would not live unless it was to live for other people, because otherwise life wasn't worth living. He wanted to see if one person could change the world. He coined the phrase "do more with less," and it can be argued that he did, truly, change the world, by changing our view of it. I'm quite sure he would wholeheartedly support the attempt esse quam videri.
Purpling
School starts tomorrow for me, and I’m pretty excited about it. My 6:00, Advanced Technical Writing and Editing, is going to focus on web design and writing for the web, and my 7:30 will be readings in technical writing, both topics that will resonate for me at work. I’ve been grinding web content this week and it’s going to continue to be a long slog for at least the next two months. I’ve got a good deal of research to do, and I’ve got to sound more authoritative and more relevant than any of our competition. Luckily we’ve got an attorney who is also a good writer who can help me out, and our Ops director is very involved, so I can’t really screw it up. It’s really a relief to have others with me on the website. It’s too important to leave to just the marketing chick, and it’s really our first foray into re-imaging the company. I love writing for work, but my brain completely craps out on me after about six solid hours of it. Lucky for me I’ve got some boring old data crunching to do - no really! Cutting and pasting and throwing numbers around feels like no-brain work to me after trying to bump up keyword density another percentage.
Dove into Seth Godin’s Purple Cow today. It’s a motivating idea. It compels me to consider suggesting that we should do more of what annoys other lawyers rather than less. So many firms take the nice, safe, blue website, red power tie, mahogany conference table approach to their marketing. It’s so boring! Maybe it’s better to be the guy everyone loves to hate. We certainly would be brighter purple. I don’t know if the boss would go for it. A CRM consultant we are talking to suggests we try for the warm and fuzzy. But I don’t know. Maybe warm and fuzzy is just a cop-out. Godin suggests that the safe way is the sure way to fewer sales in the long run. It makes me go hmmm. Needs more thought, I think.
Tired of myself
I’m sick of thinking about my problems, my fears, and my anxiety; by now surely they must be sick of me. Things are good. More than good, really. School is starting very soon (August 18th, in fact), work is chugging along, and I’m getting married. Phew. Anaïs Nin was right: “Nothing happens, and nothing happens, and then everything happens.” But I still have nightmares, I’m still clenching the sides of my seat when I see brake lights ahead of us in traffic, and I still lay down every night, wondering if I will sleep.
Richard and I drove to State in the misting rain this morning. The streets bore only a third of their normal traffic; everyone was staying home to avoid the coming hurricane. We parked in one of the housing parking lots amid what seemed like hundreds of SUVs and station wagons bearing the belongings of the students who were moving in. I felt like a freshman again. It’s been seventeen years since I last walked upon a college campus as a student. We went to get my student ID made. I forgot to smile, and so ended up with a horrible picture. Richard reminded me that next month I’ll be a Tackabery, and I can get another one made. While we were waiting for my ID to come out of the machine, Richard noticed that the other ID maker was playing Doom on his pc. Ah, college.
My errands went much better than I expected they would; the crowds were fairly light. I spent over one hundred dollars on books and things and then we went to eat at Second City Grill. Afterwards I got my haircut and my eyebrows done. By the time of my wedding, my curls will be halfway decent. I am feeling extremely sore from my workout yesterday. The trainer at the gym I just joined promised me I’d be a totally different person a year from now, but I am already changed; I’m a graduate student, and I’m about to be a wife. Both are states of being I never imagined myself in. Part of me knows I am well-equipped to meet the challenges of both, and part of me is absolutely terrified. But I’ve heard that bravery isn’t being afraid, but rather going on, despite your fear. That’s me, going on.
